Feel this need for You

I grew up
with "The Donut Man"
singing
"Life without Jesus
is like a donut
'cause there's a hole in the middle of your heart."

I always thought
that was so cheesy
and childish
and wrong.

I did not
need Jesus
to fill that hole.

I just need more books
and I won't feel so empty.
If I just get my grades up,
I'll feel fulfilled.
More music.
More activities.
More friends
(at least, I tried).
Imaginary friends.
Sharp,
shooting,
beautiful,
self-inflicted,
pain-killing
pain.

Nothing.
Absolutely nothing.
An empty void of nothingness.

And nothing,
absolutely nothing
could fill it.